Alignment

Can somebody explain to me why every six to eight months or so, my car requires yet another alignment?



I got my car 2 years ago. It was brand new, and while not the fanciest kind  out there, it's certainly a respectable model. Over the past year, I have, on 2 occasions, been faced with the following dilemma: either pay for an alignment or run the risk of accidentally becoming one with the adjacent lane of traffic the next time I'm out driving.

Now I realize that potholes and the like can cause your car to become misaligned, and since Central New Jersey sports its share of poorly-paved roads, it's no wonder that I'm slowly becoming a Pep Boys regular.

Still, I can't help but think that the whole concept of making drivers pay to maintain their respective car alignments is completely unacceptable. Shouldn't cars be designed in such a way that they can withstand a fair amount of road wear and tear?

Let's say you bought a car 6 months ago, fresh off the lot. If you were driving along in that car and all of a sudden, your engine failed, you'd find yourself sitting in the lounge area of the dealership, sipping coffee and snacking on crullers while your car got repaired, free of charge. But if you suddenly noticed your car pulling to the left, well, sorry buddy, that's all you.

I paid over a hundred dollars for my last alignment, and as I signed the paperwork, I asked the guy "So, do I at least get some sort of guarantee on this alignment that it'll last at least x number of months, weeks, days?"

"Oh, we never guarantee alignments," the guy answered. "You could drive on out of here, run over a pothole, and find yourself needing an alignment all over again. We can't run that risk."

Oh, you can't run that risk.

What about us, the car-dependant New Jersey residents who are nothing but slaves to the crappy roads provided for our driving displeasure?

Within a five-mile radius of my house, there are about 10 separate roads that I'd easily classify as "poorly-maintained." (Ironically, one of those roads happens to be called Line Road, but anyone in or around the Holmdel area can tell you that "Kidney-Jarring Lane" would be far more appropriate.) I have no choice but to drive on these roads in all of their post snow plow destruction glory, yet I am also expected to shell out one hundred bucks for an alignment every six months because my disgustingly high property taxes aren't enough to warrant the occasional local road fixer upper.

Oh, and I love those warning ads that state that maintaining proper car alignment is the consumer's responsibility, and that "warning signs" should never be neglected or ignored no matter how recent your last alignment was.

I mean, if I wanted to get really technical (and go broke at the same time), then based on the conditions of the roads that I tend to drive on and their subsequent effects on my car, I probably need a new alignment every time I drive my car. That's approximately 345 alignments a year, taking into account snow days and bouts of laziness during which I tend to simply stay home. At one hundred dollars a pop, that's $34,500 a year in alignment costs just to retain the ability to travel throughout the great state of New Jersey.

People ask me why I became a freelance writer, and I usually answer by going on and on about my love of the written word and the wonders of being my own boss. In reality, I did it to avoid having to pay for alignments. It's just cheaper this way, now that I can mostly work from home.

Perhaps one day they'll engineer a car that can manage to stay aligned despite the ragged road conditions it will undoubtedly face. Till then, it's back to the local Pep Boys. Good times.